


Three's (Company / A Crowd)

by thewalrus_said



Category: Galavant (TV)
Genre: Accidental Marriage, Accidental Polygamy, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-09
Updated: 2016-02-09
Packaged: 2018-05-19 09:09:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5961847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewalrus_said/pseuds/thewalrus_said
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sid is the greatest hero currently active in the Seven Realms, now that Galavant's retired. It's fact. Therefore, he is definitely capable of explaining to his two best friends what happened to their marriage. Totally. For sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Three's (Company / A Crowd)

Sid's nursing a pint of beer when he first meets the King of his realm. The man slides onto the stool next to him and hissed, "Yes, hello, king of your realm, don't make a thing, I'm hiding from my guards."

"Got it," Sid says with a nod. "No fuss. Why's your face all…" he trails off, waving a hand at the shadowy mass inside the king's hood instead of eyes and a nose and other identifiable features.

"I haven't been cast yet."

"Ah. Sorry, mate, that's rough." Sid signals for a pint for his new friend. "Can you drink, actually?"

"Of course!" The king sounds affronted. "I may not have a face or a name but I still exist, you know." Sid makes an apologetic face and the king shrugs. "It is what it is. Say, you're Sir Sid, aren't you? Former squire of Sir Galavant, currently traveling with Gareth to save his mad lady love from her own darkness?"

"That's the one!" Sid beams. He's still not over getting recognized. How Galavant became so cavalier about it he'll never know.

"Where is Gareth, anyway?"

Sid points out the window, where Gareth is circling, arms spread. "He's singing about Madalena. Ordinarily I'd be right out there harmonizing, but I'm just getting over a cold, you know." That, and he doesn't have the strength to avoid snide asides about the woman, and he's still too wary of Gareth for that. They're friends, but he's not dumb.

The conversation keeps going, but Sid can't really remember most of what happens next; Richard and Roberta are probably having a scene, it's been awhile since they did anything. When the script comes back to him, Sid's laughing. "Honestly, I love Gal, really I do, but he's kind of the worst, you know? He can't even remember Isabella's full _name_ , I had to step in during the proposal and help him!"

He laughs, but the king doesn't join in. "You participated in the proposal?"

"Yeah," Sid says, suddenly unsure of the conversation they're having. "Is that a problem? I mean, I know the proposal is a contract almost as binding as a wedding, but I didn't really _do_ anything, right?"

"Nothing actionable in a court," the king says after a moment's thought. "You're probably fine. Unless…"

"Unless?"

"You didn't participate in the wedding too, did you?" the king asks.

Sid hesitates. The king groans. "Well, it's just that the head monk was taking forever, you know, and I really had to pee…"

The king drains the rest of his drink. "Call Gareth back in. You've got a subplot."

\-------------

Sid knocks on the door of the small beachfront cottage after only ten minutes of pacing and deliberation, which is possibly the most heroic thing he's ever done. Isabella opens it immediately. "Done deliberating then? Come on in, it's wonderful to see you." She hugs him as he passes, which is nice.

Galavant is in the kitchen, and also hugs him, which is nice if slightly more unexpected. "Sid! You finished contemplating just in time for dinner."

"Yeah, that's mostly why I stopped pacing," Sid confesses, taking off his jacket and hanging it by the back door. "Didn't want to be late."

"You're not, that's just me," Isabella says from behind him.

"What." Galavant freezes and stares at her. The music swells hopefully.

"Hush, darling. Food now, songs later." The music dies back down.

They make it three-quarters of the way through dinner before Galavant says, "Question for you, Sid. Last I heard, you and Gareth were headed for an unnamed range of mysterious mountains a five day's ride from here."

"Yeah, we made it there yesterday." Sid shovels one last bite of food into his mouth. Galavant's become an excellent cook, and he has a feeling the meal's about to be over. He takes another bite.

"So how did you get here so quickly?" Isabella asks, pushing her plate away. She's clearly caught the ominous beat subtly pulsing through the extradiegetic soundtrack too.

Sid braces himself. "We montaged."

"Sid!" Isabella bursts out.

"That is so dangerous!" Galavant shouts at the same time.

"I know, I know, but it's important! I had to get back here quick as possible, and Gareth agreed the risk was worth it!"

"Oh, well, if _Gareth_ says," Galavant mutters.

Isabella puts a hand on Gal's arm. "What was so important, Sid?"

Sid takes a deep breath. He's a hero. He's done many heroic things. He can totally handle explaining how he accidentally put himself into his closest friends' marriage.

"Huh," Isabella says, a few beats after he finishes. Sid takes a gulp of water - he'd been a bit high-pitched by the end, and his throat hurts.

"Didn't see that one coming," Galavant says. Sid looks between the two of them. The music's gone now, so whatever happens next is clearly the most important part of the episode.

"I mean," Isabella starts, "It's not like I've _never_ thought about a threesome…"

"No," Galavant agrees, "Obviously I've _thought_ about it…"

"What," Sid says, still looking between the two of them. He's going to get dizzy if the script doesn't pick up the pace.

Isabella snaps out of her reverie and smiles at him. "What do you think, Sid?"

"What do I think about what?" He's still reeling over the contemplative way Galavant is looking at him.

"Well," she says, "It seems like we have a few options. We can file for divorce, I'm sure the monks will be understanding, given the situation. Or we can go ahead and consummate, and make everything fully official."

All the blood in Sid's body seems to have forgotten where it's supposed to go. It's in his ears all of a sudden, then the back of his neck, then... other places (including, weirdly, his right foot). It must show on his face, because Galavant adds, "Or we can procrastinate. Decide another day. We could put it off until the end of the season, I bet, although probably not longer than that."

"Why do I have to go first? You're the hero, Gal!" Sid points at him.

"Retired." Gal's far too smug for Sid's liking.

"And you, Isabella! You're the socially superior ass-kicking princess hero!"

"On sabbatical." Isabella sounds just as smug as Galavant. Really, they were made for each other.

"If you need to sing through your feelings first, that's totally fine, and there's a soundproof room right through that door." Galavant points to an incongruous metal door off the hallway.

"No, that's alright, thanks. I'm getting over a cold." Sid shuts his eyes. He's totally, totally a hero, even the king of his own realm said so. He can for sure tell his best friends he wants in on their relationship. "Iwannaconsummateandbemarriedtoyouguys."

"Sorry, what?" Galavant shifts in his seat to face Sid even more head-on. "Can you repeat that, I don't speak babble.

"I'd like to be married to you guys. Please." Sid holds his breath.

Isabella and Galavant both let theirs out in huge gusts of air. "Oh, thank god," Galavant says.

"We've been talking about it a lot, practically every day, but we didn't want to scare you off," Isabella explains, taking Sid's hand. "So what do you say, Sid? Shall we do this?"

"No time like the present," Sid agrees. Galavant takes his other hand. Sid has just enough time to give the camera a helpless, excited grin before he's towed out of shot.

\-------------

Sid shows up to his rendezvous spot with Gareth two days later, humming Isabella's pregnancy song. There's a link of Galavant's chain mail wrapped around his left ring finger. Gareth, thankfully, doesn't mention either. "Sorry we have to take the long way back," Sid says, "but -"

"But montages are dangerous and need to be used sparingly," Gareth finishes with him. "Yeah, Richard gave me the whole spiel while I was there. S'alright. You get your mess sorted out?"

"Oh yes," Sid says. He's as smug as the other two now. It's a nice thematic link. "Quite satisfactorily."

"Yeah, yeah." But Gareth looks pleased for him, Sid thinks. "Roberta gave me a lead on a shortcut. Apparently there are time-skip tunnels in the unnamed range of mysterious mountains a five day's ride from here. Should knock two days off, if we time it right. You in?"

"Definitely."

As they ride away, Sid can feel the credits roll across his back. Definitely his favorite episode so far.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is what happens when you marathon all of season 2 a few hours before bed. You get this plot bunny right before you start trying to sleep.


End file.
